Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Point, Counterpoint

Remember the old Point/Counterpoint segment on 60 Minutes? Or better yet, the Saturday Night Live parody of the same (

Dan Aykroyd: Hello. I'm "Weekend Update" Station Manager Dan Aykroyd. This week, the Shah of Iran declared martial law, in an attempt to put a stop to the violent writing which has paralyzed his country. The Shah is the subject of tonight's "Point/Counterpoint". Jane will take the Anti-Shah Point, and I will take the Pro-Shah Counterpoint. Jane?

Jane Curtin: Dan, I know exactly what you're going to say: "Jane, you ignorant slut! The Shah is our friend, he sent us oil during the 70's re-embargo. He's a fighter against Communism." Maybe so, Dan, but what happened to the human rights you scream about every time a Saranski gets sentenced to some Soviet jail? Why is it wrong to torture a dissident and freezing Siberian Goulag, but okay to wire a leftist student's genitals in a baking Tehran dungeon? I only hope that someday someone wires your genitals, Dan. Then you'll be singing a different tune!

Dan Aykroyd: Jane, you poor, misguided scrag! Sure, the Shah's a jerk, but he's all we've got! Just look at the map. To the north, the Soviet Union; to the east and west, Afghanistan and Iraq. Both leftist radical states; and in the south, the Persian Gulf. Any idiot can see that Iran would be a prized stepping stone in an eventual Soviet takeover of the world. And when that happens, Jane, those Cossacks will be coming over here with their broom handle, and we'll see how you'll feel then! Of course, you'd probably love it, you ignorant slut!

Jane Curtin: That's the news. Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

More? Here you go, but be forewarned, the following video from Hulu ( is funny, but Dan Akroyd's counterpoint is likely to offend some folks today:


  1. totally unrelated, but CHICKENS!!

  2. Maybe we could have a point/counterpoint on chickens - snl style, of course.

  3. Would that start something like "Doug, you ignorant c***" ?

    Sorry, couldn't resist.

  4. As a humble civil-servant, I am 100% neutral on all Monona chicken-related issues, but in the interest of debate, here you go!

    Counterpoint on chickens, courtesy of Slate :