Sunday, August 22, 2010

NOAA Acknowledges Global Warming, Pogo Sticks Sales Skyrocket

With no apologies whatsoever to Mr. Justice Gableman:

The NOAA has reported nearly record high global temps for July 2010, including 102°F (39°C) in Moscow. And they posted a bunch of other facts about how warm it's getting (no. Ethel, it's not just you.).

NOAA has not connected any of these dots with Ron Johnson's views on sunspots and global warming, but it's good to know the GOP candidate for US Senator is following the weather.

However, recent reports do show a startling  increase in pogo stick sales.

Just think of all those overweight American kids bouncing up and down on the earth's surface. OK, done thinking? Well, it's not just kid stuff because all those pogo sticks are warming up the earth's mantle and if you saw 2012, you know that is not good news. Moreover, if an equal number of Chinese kids don't start bouncing on the pogo stick, the earth is likely to become lop-sided, spin out of orbit, and start bumping into other planets.

(Holy mackerel, you can spend almost $300 on a pogo stick.)

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